Only one kid bucked me this morning on the collar shirts, I didn't give in to an argument, just reminded him that I'd remember this disobedience when he asked for my help at some point. Go ahead and defy authority, I already know the end of this story.
A short post this morning as I need to go with Sarah so her surgeon can release her totally healed from that emergency appendectomy that laid her out last month. I get the fun job of entertaining her children.
My kids were fussy, tired and full of imaginary aches, pains and boo boos that can only be soothed by mama yesterday, after an entire day spent trying to act normal in a world full of white, privileged children who have their eyes on the prize.
Sarah, a product of that world long ago, although tempered by her experiences in the New Orleans Free School, plus a few years of Montessori, now determined to take each year step by step, homeschooling her children, was cemented in her decision yesterday just watching my kids disintegrate in front of her eyes. Having me as a mama also encouraged Sarah's independence and creativity level, I suppose, as I was fresh out of the 1960s at that point in my life, when society had been turned on its head.
I'll defend public school to my last breath as we have an awesome system here in our county. My Catholic sister-in-law, Mary, once remarked decades ago that she was surprised at how well Ellen, Jim, Gary and I turned out, since we'd been public school kids versus the parochial ones. "And all y'all got into such good colleges...." left unsaid might have been, "Who knew?"
But nowadays...I do see the virtues of homeschooling, private schools and religious schools. Public schools can stifle an individual, I often was either bored or terribly unchallenged as a child, retreating to library books for entertainment and education.
Our county has done everything humanly possible to help my children, all square pegs for a variety of reasons, struggling to fit in the round holes of conformity that don't quite fit us for so many reasons - traumatized, labeled, unstable, angry, sad, and on and on.
Yet Daniel, now finishing up at UGA plus serving our country in the Army, down at Fort Stewart for a few weeks, texting Yolie and I early this morning about his scholarship that he'd won plus his Army responsiblities nearly makes us both explode with pride. Daniel thrived within our school system, picking excellent friends that he later roomed with in college, making wonderful choices plus playing baseball and football for years after once being a very trauamatized child his ownself. I wish I had the key...
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my children have all had great years, wonderful teachers, and learned a lot in brief stints of their positive public school years... even my son (who I have spent tens of thousands fighting the school system... most years) had one great year back in 2004-2005 that could not be provided in any alternative...
but over all the other years have left much lacking...
our choice to homeschool ends up coming down to SAFETY, basic simple safety.... I'd like my kids to come home to me alive, not in jail.... not sexually assulted....
and that is so sad to me .... so much money goes to fund programs that are not safe ....
and I teach at public school...
I live in a large urban district though, 27th largest in the country...
schools of 2-3 thousand kids....
we lived some where for 4 months once, pre-K 12th had 400 students... kids were safe there...
I'd sure love to be able to not work and stay home with them
I've come to realize over several very tumultuous school years, that our kids (being the square pegs they are) are only going to do as well as they're going to do. I've had positive experiences in public school settings and also very, very negative ones. Same for parochial, same for charter, same for home schooling. As you can see, we've run the gamut here - just searching for where they'd fit in. Well, a few are going to fit into public great because we finally have the services in place that we've fought for year after year (to a certain degree anyway). Of course, the kids had to disintegrate to the point where the powers-that-be finally acknowledged the severity of the issues - they couldn't possibly take MY word for anything.... A few will fit in with parochial - for now anyway, and one will be homeschooled this year (again) followed by her sister next year (when she hits high school) because she doesn't have a lick of sense. She WILL be the kid who ends up pregnant and drug addicted in her teens because she simply trusts everyone she meets to have her best interests in mind (and I have the notes she wrote to other kids in school to prove it!). So the bottom line is that sometimes we have to do what's best for each one individually (even if it is a colossal pain in the butt for us). Will it make a difference? Who knows? All I know is that I will be able to say I did everything I could possibly think of to try to help my kids. Some people don't have the choices I do so I know I am blessed. There are a few choices out there I wish I could afford and I can't and those are the ones that will keep me striving for MORE for them.
I homeschool too. I had a few good yrs for each of my 2 eldest but more years that were not good. My now 13 y/o was so quiet he flew under the radar and school was so crowded his educational needs were overlooked. My eldest with his autistic tendencies was not well served in public school at all. His educational abilities were held back while they put him in the "behaviors" class thereby only succeeding in giving him kids with bigger problems behaviorally as his role model. Yup, that sure was great! LOL
My 3 oldest went to the local state schools and flew through - no problems. My youngest 3 (adoptees) requested the catholic schools (they had been raised catholic) and I have been shocked at they amount of promiscuity that goes on, especially at the high school. The admin and teachers just seem to accept this as part of growing up!!!!! No wonder our son (16) has not been able to pass anything for the past 2 years. Thank goodness we are moving, well hopefully, my kids keep disappearing at night!!!!. It's going to be a huge adjustment, I know, for them, (this is a first move with their family) but hopefully they will be moving to a more "healthy" rural environment.
Time will tell, I guess.
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